Importance Of BDSM Rituals

Importance Of BDSM Rituals

By Lifestyle Mistress Alina Sky

 

Hello My Loves.! For this November, LDW 20th Anniversary Month, I’ve decided to start with A blog about The Importance Of BDSM Rituals, and dive into  why we need them.

As a Lifestyle Dominatrix I really feel those rituals are the foundation you build upon. It puts both the Dominant and the Submissive in the right frame of mine before a session, and really sets the tone for a deep, meaningful experience both ways.

So if you’ve ever wondered about The Importance of BDSM rituatls, what they are and why you need them, please read on!  And as always you can contact me for a session where we can figure out what type of BDSM rituals are perfect for you!

Importance Of BDSM Rituals
BDSM Rituals- Function

Rituals are a vital and important part of any healthy and fully functioning BDSM relationship.
They reinforce both the Dominant and submissive roles and responsibilities within said relationships, and can be a way to stay centered and focused, in your “sub-space” Or “Dom-Space”. I know they are a vital part of my own practice, Especially when I provide Phone Sessions, because I KNOW it comes through with my clients, and have been told so many times.
Now, of course I do understand that creating powerful , enjoyalbe and easy to sustain Dom/sub rituals (that don’t lose their efficacy long term)  may be challenging.

Let’s see if I can help with that, and of course, for your specific custom BDSM solutions, I’m only a phone call away.

Importance Of BDSM Rituals –
What Are They Exactly?

Understand that Rituals and Rules are NOT the same. Rituals prepare you for a session whilst rules are placed in your submission contract or agreement with your Mistress, Dominant and Owner.

So, What are BDSM rituals?
In my practice and when I chat with my fellow Femdom Mistresses, I realize that occassionally, people will use the words “rituals”, “rules”, and” protocols” interchangeably, as if they are all similar or even the same things.
Well, I assure you, that an experience Dominant will know very well that but those are all quite different. Each serving a facent of the Dom/sub relationship.

So let’s start with this one:
A BDSM protocol is a hard and fast rule, non negotiable and set to be observed in all future interaxtions between the Don/sub.  Said protocol is usually listed in a D/s contract. That way everyone knows where they stand (Or Kneel).

Now, a BDSM Ritual is really more of a way of carrying somthing out. A task, an action priors to the session, Or a specific command given to you by your Dominant.
And so, It almost always involves a specific action where your Dominant prescribes a series of behaviors, tasks, or acts by the submissive to be carried out on behalf of their Mistress Or Master’s pleasure and benefit.

Importance Of BDSM Rituals
Why Have Dom/sub Rituals In Place?

 

BDSM Rituals, just like their counterparts BDSM Decorum, Rules, Contracts, Etiquette and various agreed upon Protocols, Are absolutely neccessary in ordert to truly transform your Dom/sub Connection, enhance your kink pleasure, and give your BDSM relationship many extra layers it truly needs to be fully effective and meaningful. I certainly take pride in all of the above. They are vital and important to my Femdom Self, My Mistress Self, and My Femdom Practice.

So, let me explain why we must have Dom/sub rituals.
BDSM Rituals have many implications of significance in the Dom/sub Relationship.

We Use Rituals as one of the ways to discipline a submissive.
My Discipline Rituals   teach my submissivew obedience,  submission, true devotion, and keep them in the right frame of mind, in sessions and out.
BDSM Correction and Discipline Rituals hold that kind of truth for This is true for myself as A Mistress as well. In my practice, when a submissive has been allowed to act way to demanding, bratty or have gotten away with topoping from the bottom, a discipline ritual will snap both of us, Myself As A Mistress and my submissive right back into place and into our actual roles!

As one of my submissives told me the other day as they prepared for our sessions according to my specific prescribed Ritual Iinstructions:
“Mistress Alina! I truly enjoy my rituals and how they help me get ready for you.
As my Goddess, I know I must present myself to you and our session in just the right manner. I view my pre session rituals in a deep, solemn and spiritual manner, they preepare me mentally and physically for the rigours that worshipping you dictates!”

You see, when my submissive clients perform a ritual pre session for me, and/or a ritual perform POST sessions as per my instructions, it feels absolutly ceremonial, deep. ,meaningful and intensly connects my submissive to me BETWEEN sessions, which is a MUST for me.
My submissives  take pleasure in knowing how those BDSM rituals connect us to one another, celebrate our BDSM relationship and make me, as their Mistress, most proud and happy.

I have my own BDSM Rituals that I practice in Real Life and EVERY day I come on here to do Phone Sessions with all of you.
I keeps me in my Femdome Mindset and gives  YOU the best immersive session experience possible.

Importance Of BDSM Rituals
BDSM Rituals Examples 

Let me Preface this by saying that BDSM Rituals are going to be unique for your porticular situation, circumstances, a type of submissive you are, and can actually develpe and evolve as your submission goals reach new hights.

Essentially,  BDSM Rituals, once put into place, are meant to be automatic. A Good and obedient submissives, shouldn’t have to be asked to perform said rituals  every time we have a session or post sessions if prescribed. HOWEVER I am a great believer in communication BEFORE  AND IF NEEDED AFTER, a session if needs be, so we can make sure the BDSM Rituals agreed upon are sustainable to you as my submissive.

Now, If a submissive is negligent or forgets to follow agreed upon BDSM Rituals, they SHOULD be disciplined to the appropriate degree. I am strict but fair.
An experienced Mistress will not make up rituals, demands, tasks etc just for the sake of having one of them in place. There must ABSOLUTELY be a very good reason for them, they MUST be meaningful to each particular submissive.

1. Kneeling
My Daddy usually goes to bed before me since he wakes up early, so once I’m all ready for the night, I sit in the bed next to him and kneel. If he doesn’t wake up by then I will lightly rub him and say, “I’m ready for bed now, Daddy.” If he hasn’t gone to bed yet I’ll kneel on the floor instead and wait for permission to get in bed. He also has me kneel before a scene as well.

BDSM Rituals Ideas and Examples

1. COLLAR RITUAL
   Having a Mistress choose to collar you as her submissive is a great honor and privilege. I do a Collar Ceremony and I love getting dressed up for it as well.
   This particular ritual is both for me and my submissive to celebrate together before every session. The submissive will place the collar and dedicate themselves to me. Sometimes after a session the submissive will spend the night sleeping with his collar on. That is always very pleasing to us both.
2. Cock Cage Ritual
   This is one of my favorites, and it works quite well and so very easy to maintain and incorporate into your D/s relationship and ownership. Similar to wearing an ownership devotion collar, the cock cage has the same effect if not a more poignant one. The submissive who carries out a chastity cage or a cock cage ritual will sometimes wear it for an extended period of time, removing it only occassioanly or upon my persmission. Getting ready to be locked up, and always asking for persmission to be released is a cherished ritual I perform with many of my clients on a regular and ongoing basis.
3. The Shaving / Grooming Ritual
   Both my male and female submissives like to prepare themsleves very specifically berfore a session with me. It is done with great reverence as they wish to present themselves to Me, Their Mistress, Goddess and Owner at the VERY BEST and top of their form.
   Their appearence is part of their submission and an extention of me, so they must do all they can to please me in how they look for me.
   A full spa day to make themselves clean and shaved everywhere is done not only by my Sissy clients or feminization clients, but by my female clients as well. So the Full shave or wax is a whole ritual of presentation that shows the suybmissive giving every inch of them to be viewed and perfect.
4. Dressing Up Ritual
   Just like the grooming Pre Session Ritual the Dressing For Your Dominant Ritual is very important. Many Dominants have a very clear preference as to how they wish their submissive to present themselves, and I am no exeption. I demand perfect hygiene, cleanliness, and at least one item that you put on for me, being it your collar, panties, or full dress up.
   As your dress up and prepare for your session you honor me,  your Goddess Mistress with your meticulous attention to every detail as you know it pleases me so! Just like Goddess Worship, you must always look your very best.
5. Punishment / Discipline Rituals
   You may not think of punishments when you’re discussing rituals as part of your BDSM relationship, however, they can actually go together quite nicely.
   When the sub misbehaves, the Dominant can tell them to get whatever implement they choose (Spoon, Cane, belt, flogger, crop,). The sub has to go fetch it, kneel, and present it in their hands, with their palms facing up towards their Master to acceptr their discipline ritual
   This can make the discipline more degrading, and as a result, more effective.
   There can be many other discipline rituals and all of those are discussed before hand.

 

Importance Of BDSM Rituals-
Do Dominants Have BDSM Rituals ?

Although usually BDSM rituals are focused more on the Submissive, I do believe that BDSM rituals are vital for BOTH Dom and Sub, Because I know that FOR ME they are very much a huge part of my Femdom Routines, way of life and practice.

Although most Dominants are not really expected to perform BDSM rituals, whenever I get ready to perform a session, especially a phone session, I feel that I need to dress a certain way, have my make up on, many times I wear heels, stockings, I NEED to feel empowered and it’s my personal BDSM Mistress Ritual that comes thorugh in every session I do.

 

Importance Of BDSM Rituals-
Finding the right rituals for you

There will be instences when a BDSM ritual feels like a good fit, but after a while, it’s  not sustainable for various reasons.
It’s is VERY important to make adjustments that work long term, or even come up with different rituals to keep matters fun and interesting. Rituals are here to HELP strengthen the connection between a Dom and a sub.

When a D/s ritual isn’t working
It may be that after performing certain rituals they will have to be modified or eliminated. Here’s an example that happened to me with a regular submissive:
This submissive has been calling me since I’ve started my work with LDW. and what I’ve noticed is that he would always vow to do a nubmer of things that may be defined as a Pre Session Ritual (such as buying sex toys, giving me a huge tip etc)
NONE of those things were sustainable AT ALL, and I basically informed him that he has to absolutly stop and make sure that whatever rituals he thinks he can offer up MUST be sustainable, otherewise he just feels like a failure when he can’t perform and complete them for whatever reason.

Occasionally a protocol or ritual may also irritate and annoy a submissive. For instance, having to ask permission for going out between sessions, or a cock cage reprieve, and so forth. Leaving those protocols or rituals unresolved isn’t really benefiting anyone, because when a ritual isn’t working, it’s not sustainable. This may upset the D/s dynamic, So I always recommend that my submissives bring it up with me if something isn’t working for them, especially BDSM rituals and protocols.

Lastly, One of the very best ways to make sure a ritual is remembered, followed and carried out properly, is to write it down!
Most of my submissives start a BDSM journal, in which they can keep up with Rituyals, Progress, Ideas and  submission goals.

Hopefully this blog post has given you some ideas for creating your own BDSM Rituals, rules and protocols.
Remember! The Goal is to find peace in your rituals. Celebrate them and your Dom/sub journey always. BDSM rituals done right, truly benefit both the Dominant and the submissive, and are essential for transformation, training, and discipline and a truly meaninfgul experience.

Do YOU Have your own BDSM Rituals ? Let me know in the comment section down below ! I read and answer all of your lovely comments!